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[Amnesia] Screenshot criticism thread
Red Offline
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RE: Screenshot criticism thread

(03-13-2014, 09:47 PM)Dogfood Wrote: so this is pretty much my first screenshot posted in here...ever.

It's a work in progress (and no i'm not done with that you see in the screenshot yet), thoughts, criticism, they're all welcome as long as explaination comes with them not just "It sucks croco dick" (i know it does).
Mind you to not expect anything special, i'm fresh at this and definetly not among the special cookies here Wink

Spoiler below!

[Image: XGm6Yr6.png]


Well theres lot to add, brighter boxlight maybe? Those windows could illuminate more light and brighten the tourches by adding a pointlight to them, check how it's done from amnesias orginal levels. The orginal levels are good example pretty much to everything.
(This post was last modified: 03-13-2014, 10:20 PM by Red.)
03-13-2014, 10:19 PM
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CarnivorousJelly Offline
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RE: Screenshot criticism thread

(03-15-2014, 12:31 AM)Robosprog Wrote: It also seems like you used a flat plane for the ground - bad dogfood! You know how I rage with that! - Use a lot of varying dirt piles from cellarbase/dungeonbase/ptest to create a slightly bumpy environment and more varied terrain.
Called it :p
(We were talking on skype when he was working on the map)

Also, that is one magnificent mass of text there, Spriggy :D

[Image: quote_by_rueppells_fox-d9ciupp.png]
03-15-2014, 12:55 AM
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Nice Offline
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RE: Screenshot criticism thread

thanks everyone for advices and opinions! Especially Robosprog, you rock Smile


Sorry but we cannot change your avatar as the new avatar you specified is too big. The maximum dimensions are 80x80 (width x height)
03-15-2014, 01:37 AM
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CarnivorousJelly Offline
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RE: Screenshot criticism thread

I'm sick so I finished making a thing!
Spoiler below!

So, pretty much, I wanted to try my hand at an "overgrown" theme. Not many assets to play with at all... grass, shrooms, floor ivy, and that funky tree pillar thing. General idea behind it was I wanted to give the appearance of a building that's been long-since abandoned and reclaimed by the plants.
[Image: overgrowntest_by_rueppells_fox-d7a82e2.png]
I dunno, something seems a little off, but I'm not sure what (aside from the two light tones). Lemme know what you think - of course criticism is encouraged.

Bed-time for me now c:

...I just realized there's also flowers.
Tomorrow (intending to put flowers in blue-ish area).

[Image: quote_by_rueppells_fox-d9ciupp.png]
(This post was last modified: 03-15-2014, 05:25 AM by CarnivorousJelly.)
03-15-2014, 05:22 AM
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Kman Offline
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RE: Screenshot criticism thread

the light streaming in from the crack in the ceiling seems way too solid and obvious. for one i'd try toning down the color on it a lot and from what it looks like (i could be wrong) i think you just used on solid halo billboard for it and given how much is in the way of the hole you'd expect to be able to see pretty clearly defined streams of light (this is one of those situations where actually being able to see the borders of them isn't necessarily a bad thing)

a source of light for where the green light is coming from could help a lot even if it is just a strategically placed halo billboard that's brighter than the rest so it looks like some light source out of the shot casting onto the section.i could imagine if you built some sort of cave area behind it and then put a spotlight with a water gobo so it looks like there's a pool of water behind it shining the light that could look pretty cool and it could add some nice detail to the area.

generally speaking the coloring/lighting in the left half seems a little too solid too, it would make it more interesting and realistic if you had some areas in it brighter/darker than others instead of just one solid shade of green

other than that it looks fantastic - the composition and coloring and details and ideas used in it are pretty incredible, definitely one of the best screenshots i've seen in a while

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03-15-2014, 05:55 AM
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CarnivorousJelly Offline
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RE: Screenshot criticism thread

Kman, you're right and that's absolutely brilliant :D (thank you)
I updated it - a lot - based on what you said and some of the stuff I wanted to throw in.
Spoiler below!

There is, in fact, a spotlight with a water gobo in the tree-root-cave area, it just doesn't look like it when it's not animated >.>
[Image: overgrowntest2_by_rueppells_fox-d7adwfw.png]
<.< I kind of f'ed up the mutli-tone green thing... I tried and it still looks monotone XD

So uhm yeah, thanks for the pointers c:

[Image: quote_by_rueppells_fox-d9ciupp.png]
03-16-2014, 09:12 AM
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Red Offline
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RE: Screenshot criticism thread

It's so real, it's unreal.
(This post was last modified: 03-16-2014, 12:39 PM by Red.)
03-16-2014, 12:39 PM
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Skyy Offline
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RE: Screenshot criticism thread

It feels a bit.. You know.. Meh. Need some help to improve this.

[Image: 10rojko.jpg]


[Image: eqt2c6.jpg]
03-16-2014, 11:10 PM
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CarnivorousJelly Offline
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RE: Screenshot criticism thread

(03-16-2014, 11:10 PM)Skyy Wrote: It feels a bit.. You know.. Meh. Need some help to improve this.
<Image 1>
<Image 2>

Alrighty I'm avoiding math because math is hard, so prepare for a nice lovely wall-o-text packed into spoiler tags with a nice little bow on top :p

Spoiler below!

Okay so, I used bold text for new topics (eg. billboards), underlined key things being addressed in relation to the topic (eg. too strong). Hope that makes sense c:

First thing's first - those billboards coming from the light are holy-crap strong! It's like a laser's beaming out of it. Having a bit of a halo around the light's a good thing, but that much is a bit excessive. Try reducing the colour by about half (so if it's at 1 1 1, change it to 0.5 0.5 0.5) or more - depending on how many billboards you have there.

I also have a question for you, what's the purpose of this room? Is it a hospital patient's room, an asylum cell, a surgery room? In general, try making the purpose of the room clear with the objects in it.
For example, if this was a surgery room, the table would have surgical tools on it - knives, small mirrors, needles, etc.. There would need to be ample amounts of light for the doctors, and a cabinet of medical supplies readily available if something goes wrong (like this sanitarium's operation room).
On the other hand, if it's an asylum cell, there would be no medicine, or sharp/heavy objects available (to prevent the patient from causing harm to themselves or others). The scribbling on the wall makes me think that this may be an asylum patient's room. Asylums were not designed with their patients' comfort in mind. The patient rooms tend to be small and cramped, like the one in the link.
If you're talking about a hospital patient's room, it's more likely to be a whole ward rather than just one bed - unless it's a quarantine room... spooky rooms - probably lots of warning signs on the walls and things.

The writing on the wall is definitely a nice touch if this is an asylum room (crazy patients :p), but it looks a little bit too organized and clumped together. I know it's possible to make the decals less organized (I had to do it for this screenshot (look behind the door and on the back wall)). You could also try adding more of it - depending on the amount of time the patient spent in the ward - and have it spiraling out from a certain point like s/he kept running out of room.

Some other details could certainly help liven up the place - cobwebs in corners, splashes of dirt/blood on the floor, cracks in the walls and ceiling, flipped over chairs/cabinets, rust on the metal objects, dust in the air (from the fog particle systems) etc.. Little details like that can help to fill up the room without limiting the player's walking space :D

All in all, it looks pretty cool, it's just lacking detail :)


[Image: quote_by_rueppells_fox-d9ciupp.png]
(This post was last modified: 03-17-2014, 12:06 AM by CarnivorousJelly.)
03-17-2014, 12:04 AM
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Skyy Offline
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RE: Screenshot criticism thread

Thank you for your opinion. I added some new details and I hope you like it! And it's supposed to be some kind of asylum.
Spoiler below!
[Image: r2wcgk.jpg]

Spoiler below!
[Image: 9r0k0z.jpg]

Oh and thank you for learning me how to use the spoiler things. ^^
03-17-2014, 12:25 PM
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