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**juxhin** · 03-23-2012 02:51 PM

Alright guys, its a bit more updated. The first 2 levels of my first CS are done, i would LOVE any feedback possible (even feedback saying its shit just try being specific please) from you guys. Please read the description and also guys don't bother giving me any feedback regarding the map overlaying etc. I know i need to fix that but still need to find the time for it. Also i don't want to give you any introduction from here as i would like to know if you guys understood the story more or less from the first 2 levels ( and also the story title ). Cheers!

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**Kreekakon** · 03-23-2012 03:21 PM

Downloading, and playing now. I'll give you feedback if I notice anything^^

I'd suggest you edit your post to include previews to the story like screenshots, or that sort of thing

**juxhin** · 03-23-2012 03:47 PM

(03-23-2012 03:21 PM)Kreekakon Wrote: Downloading, and playing now. I'll give you feedback if I notice anything^^

I'd suggest you edit your post to include previews to the story like screenshots, or that sort of thing

Hey mate thanks alot, on mobile atm so can't really do much but will watch for any feedback

**Kreekakon** · 03-23-2012 03:56 PM

Here's a bit of feedback, but I got stuck halfway, so I haven't beaten it yet.

Spoiler below!

**juxhin** · 03-23-2012 04:06 PM

(03-23-2012 03:56 PM)Kreekakon Wrote: Here's a bit of feedback, but I got stuck halfway, so I haven't beaten it yet.

Spoiler below!

-Nice strong first few seconds. First room looks quite nice.
-Decals near the first guy in the fire in the first room are clipping. Move them up a little to prevent it.
-Watch the grammar. Capitalize "i"s
-Several of the walls are clipping. This is present quite a lot.
-Why does the game keep making me "grab" stuff? This can confuse the player quite a bit.
-Is it just me, or are all of your bag-head people shrunk? Any reason for that?

In the second room however, after I got the crowbar, I got stuck. I tried using the crow bar on the last door which was still locked, but it didn't work. Am I missing something?

Hey man thanks for the comments i'll reply to all:
Yea there are quite a few map bugs which i still need to stay fixing since i was working on my own and my main objective was succeeding in the scripts and think about the map later on. I forgot about the grammer and will fix that quickly. There is the satanic dagger in the beginning of the map which i put there trying to think about a "scare" that i should collide with once the player picks it up. The crowbar is the end of the demo where i intend to use it to open the next area when i continue editing it (if i think its worth it). The bag headed people are shrunk on purpose to look like this man performed satanic rituals on little children. I'll keep this updated

**Kreekakon** · 03-23-2012 04:20 PM

Okay I realize that this may be a demo, but I still should tell you a few things.

Even if it is a demo, they should really have proper "endings" to the demo in question, otherwise it feels like an uncompleted work which is only up for testing. Remember! You put this in the SHOWCASE section, where as it says "Only post completed playable/usable projects.". The least you should do is let the player know the demo is over by having credits roll.

Also, this can be remedied later on if you choose to, but you should really convoy your story better. Like, I, for instance could in no way know or even guess that the bag-headed people were little kids with rituals performed on them.

Remember what I said, and go fix it up. Looking forward to what you can bring for us when you do =)

**juxhin** · 03-23-2012 04:55 PM

(03-23-2012 04:20 PM)Kreekakon Wrote: Okay I realize that this may be a demo, but I still should tell you a few things.

Even if it is a demo, they should really have proper "endings" to the demo in question, otherwise it feels like an uncompleted work which is only up for testing. Remember! You put this in the SHOWCASE section, where as it says "Only post completed playable/usable projects.". The least you should do is let the player know the demo is over by having credits roll.

Also, this can be remedied later on if you choose to, but you should really convoy your story better. Like, I, for instance could in no way know or even guess that the bag-headed people were little kids with rituals performed on them.

Remember what I said, and go fix it up. Looking forward to what you can bring for us when you do =)

Yea fixing the map pieces as we speak, im thinking whether i should display the 'introduction' as a note or in the description?

**hamlehdk** · 03-23-2012 05:02 PM

There is a bug in one off the room's (when i got in the room and closed the door i could open it and i tried everything but it didn't work) But the story was great in the start!! Smile

**juxhin** · 03-23-2012 05:11 PM

(03-23-2012 05:02 PM)hamlehdk Wrote: There is a bug in one off the room's (when i got in the room and closed the door i could open it and i tried everything but it didn't work) But the story was great in the start!!

Thanks mate! yea i still need to continue that should've stopped the story before but didn't know that so sorry about it Big Grin

, i'll be working on it to finish it off

Worked on the map and fixed up the walls a bit, still got some left. I added a note at the very beginning close to the boy inside the fire circle. How does this sound as an introduction:

"How much more blood do i have to shed to pay my sins and bring back my loved ones? Only managed to sack jeremy and jacob and left their younger brother hanging for now. Grandpa was stupid for trying to interfere, this plan seemed so flawless at first but somethings not working right..[br][br]Friday 13th, 1874[br]Envictus Maternis"

Also removed the dagger which was pointless and might add an extra scare along the long corridor in level 2 (Maybe a pot exploding)

**Kreekakon** · 03-23-2012 05:26 PM

(03-23-2012 04:55 PM)juxhin Wrote: Yea fixing the map pieces as we speak, im thinking whether i should display the 'introduction' as a note or in the description?

Depends on what you're able to do. If you can pace it well enough, I'd recommend putting it as part of the actual "game". It can spew out better immersion compared with a block of text on the description. Still, it depends on your story telling skills.

Also it'd be nice if we could know who you were in the story.

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