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[Amnesia] Screenshot criticism thread
Wapez Offline
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RE: Screenshot criticism thread

[Image: Amnesia2013-11-0100-31-57-12_zpsa775d3f4.jpg]
[Image: Amnesia2013-11-0100-32-20-94_zps30dabdc5.jpg]
[Image: Amnesia2013-11-0100-32-39-32_zpsf90fe22d.jpg]


Sorry about the hint...^^

Now let me know what you think!

Founder & Legally Accountable Publisher of Red Line Games.
Environment & Gameplay Designer and Scripter.
http://moddb.com/mods/in-lucys-eyes
11-01-2013, 12:39 AM
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CarnivorousJelly Offline
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RE: Screenshot criticism thread

Billboards look a little too bright in the first one - the room's too dark for them to be that light, and the air's too clean for them to be that thick. Maybe try toning them down to... 50% of whatever they are now? The lighting's also a little bit too dark, looks like you either have a very, very dark boxlight or no boxlight at all.

Other than that, I really like your use of pillars and bookshelves; the layout is fantastic!

[Image: quote_by_rueppells_fox-d9ciupp.png]
11-01-2013, 02:24 AM
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Wapez Offline
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RE: Screenshot criticism thread

(11-01-2013, 02:24 AM)Kia Wrote: Billboards look a little too bright in the first one - the room's too dark for them to be that light, and the air's too clean for them to be that thick. Maybe try toning them down to... 50% of whatever they are now? The lighting's also a little bit too dark, looks like you either have a very, very dark boxlight or no boxlight at all.

Other than that, I really like your use of pillars and bookshelves; the layout is fantastic!

You're probably right about the billboards, I'll look into that and improve them as much as I can.

I tend to use very dark boxlights in my maps, as I'm a big fan of contrasts between dark and bright, and how they affect the human mind. Kind of the way FG used them pretty often. However, I'll do some more research and see if I can improve in any way that I feel comfortable with myself.
(Remember, screenshots are darker than in-game vision.)

Thank you for the feedback!

Founder & Legally Accountable Publisher of Red Line Games.
Environment & Gameplay Designer and Scripter.
http://moddb.com/mods/in-lucys-eyes
(This post was last modified: 11-01-2013, 01:32 PM by Wapez.)
11-01-2013, 01:19 PM
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Hardarm Offline
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RE: Screenshot criticism thread

I really love the colours in that pic. It really reminds of FG maps Wink
If you work a bit more on architecture and level design you should be perfect

listen to boards of canada
11-01-2013, 02:11 PM
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Wapez Offline
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RE: Screenshot criticism thread

(11-01-2013, 02:11 PM)Hardy Floppy Arm Wrote: I really love the colours in that pic. It really reminds of FG maps Wink
If you work a bit more on architecture and level design you should be perfect

Do you have any examples on how I can improve those aspects?

Founder & Legally Accountable Publisher of Red Line Games.
Environment & Gameplay Designer and Scripter.
http://moddb.com/mods/in-lucys-eyes
11-01-2013, 02:25 PM
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Hardarm Offline
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RE: Screenshot criticism thread

I don't really know what to say about it because that's you to decide how to organize those. it's just.. make the sets of object more appealing and less plain to the eyes.
For example, paintings and sketches aren't always 100% perpendicular to the ground. Rotate them a little, would be cool even by just 1 degree.
Also, in the shelves section, they aren't always fully 100% in line, rotate them by 1 degree like before, try to hint there's a bit of chaos in those.

In that room there are two sections that look almost equal to each other, because there seem to be too many lines of shelves, which look artificial and boring. Just remove the line against the wall at the other side of the room and put something else? Big Grin

Hints for detailing: try near the shelves to add some book piles and some books laid against a shelf and other ones at the ground. Make it at the borders so you don't obstruct the player's gameplay by having annoying objects cutting his path.

Also, for the lighting, make the billboards more faint and the light of the window more shallow. Avoid using too many light and contrast points in a unique room: if you want a light zone and there is another smaller/bigger one next to it, just chain them together (as, light the section between the one and the another) and put some details in the 'chaining area, BUT, in that case, in the first room, just remove that banner because it doesn't look that good in that position. there must be more attention to the door other than to the banner right? and it's too near the door it just looks bad Wink

Anyways, the complex is really cool and I love the lighting colours as I said and details are great Smile

listen to boards of canada
(This post was last modified: 11-01-2013, 04:52 PM by Hardarm.)
11-01-2013, 04:49 PM
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Wapez Offline
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RE: Screenshot criticism thread

(11-01-2013, 04:49 PM)Hardy Floppy Arm Wrote: I don't really know what to say about it because that's you to decide how to organize those. it's just.. make the sets of object more appealing and less plain to the eyes.
For example, paintings and sketches aren't always 100% perpendicular to the ground. Rotate them a little, would be cool even by just 1 degree.
Also, in the shelves section, they aren't always fully 100% in line, rotate them by 1 degree like before, try to hint there's a bit of chaos in those.

In that room there are two sections that look almost equal to each other, because there seem to be too many lines of shelves, which look artificial and boring. Just remove the line against the wall at the other side of the room and put something else? Big Grin

Hints for detailing: try near the shelves to add some book piles and some books laid against a shelf and other ones at the ground. Make it at the borders so you don't obstruct the player's gameplay by having annoying objects cutting his path.

Also, for the lighting, make the billboards more faint and the light of the window more shallow. Avoid using too many light and contrast points in a unique room: if you want a light zone and there is another smaller/bigger one next to it, just chain them together (as, light the section between the one and the another) and put some details in the 'chaining area, BUT, in that case, in the first room, just remove that banner because it doesn't look that good in that position. there must be more attention to the door other than to the banner right? and it's too near the door it just looks bad Wink

Anyways, the complex is really cool and I love the lighting colours as I said and details are great Smile

Thank you! Will definitely take this into consideration while improving the map.

Founder & Legally Accountable Publisher of Red Line Games.
Environment & Gameplay Designer and Scripter.
http://moddb.com/mods/in-lucys-eyes
11-01-2013, 05:27 PM
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CarnivorousJelly Offline
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RE: Screenshot criticism thread

I have a small-ish update on one of my maps that I figured was share-worthy.
Spoiler below!

[Image: TheLibrary.png]

Sorry it's not a huge impressive update. I've been working on actually fleshing out the floors that aren't displayed here (mainly because they look pretty boring at the moment). But I tried to incorporate the advice I was given the last time I posted the library here - feels like ages ago. I know you've already seen the first one on there - I just couldn't resist including it anyways. I didn't tweak much - just a few details.

Any feedback at all would be much appreciated, I'll respond when I wake up tomorrow morning!

(right-click and open in a new tab/window for super HD view)


[Image: quote_by_rueppells_fox-d9ciupp.png]
(This post was last modified: 11-02-2013, 09:08 AM by CarnivorousJelly.)
11-02-2013, 09:05 AM
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Zokrar Offline
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RE: Screenshot criticism thread

Hey Kia,


Two things popped out at me when looking at your pictures. In the top left picture, something looks a bit odd about the window on the roof. As if it might be stretched a little bit much. And for the picture on the bottom right, I feel as if it's lacking detail. The wall, specifically, looks very bland to me. Above all though, the detail you've put in is incredible. It looks very good!




I've been trying to get better at outdoor mapping. Could I get some tips on what to add/change with this screenshot please? I'm trying to create an eerie forest area.

Spoiler below!
[Image: qxJqsCH.png]
Spoiler below!
[Image: oPRUOly.png]

(This post was last modified: 11-02-2013, 04:05 PM by Zokrar.)
11-02-2013, 04:00 PM
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Wapez Offline
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RE: Screenshot criticism thread

Kia,
The point of a library is obviously to have a lot of shelves with books in them. But stacking several shelves beside each other over and over again makes the area look very linear and, in my opinion, removes the "life" from the map. I suggest you twist and turn shelves, put them beside each other with different distance between them and in general make it look a bit more like it was actually put there by people, and has been slightly affected and moved by people. I cannot say that you aren't thinking of what I'm mentioning, but on your pictures I see that these things could be improved.

Also, I don't think the lighting looks realistic. Either you have a way too bright boxlight, or the pointlights area way too big and their color is far from what the light coming from a window or a lamp provides. I would say, lower the boxlights color so it's very faint, and let the pointlights and spotlights do their work to enhance the light that's coming from the logical light sources.

Other than that, I love your mapping and I think you make beautiful maps. Keep doing what you're doing!

Founder & Legally Accountable Publisher of Red Line Games.
Environment & Gameplay Designer and Scripter.
http://moddb.com/mods/in-lucys-eyes
11-02-2013, 04:34 PM
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